(Writing after years.... but i wrote this a long time ago and publishing it now after making a few changes... it may not make sense to many.... but i hope you like it this way...)
This may not be the most original line
But whoever wrote it had alot in their mind
as it does sum up everything that comes into our lives
and we have to keep going, thinking
this too shall pass
When someone comes storming into your life
just after you thought that all is well, the way it is now....
but they come and hit you like a lightning bolt, that shakes you up
and despite everything, how much ever you wanted otherwise,
you do the right thing... and then hold on to it and think
this too shall pass
When the person you loved the most at one point
Has almost gone away from your life
but still a shadow sits there... somehow calling you back
but you harden your will power
tell yourself that once you're busy all over again, maybe
this too shall pass...
When nostalgia hits
When you would give anything to go back to old times Where people knew you, where you meant something to some and where, despite the problems you were in your comfort zone But you do know that the bubble you are in, has to burst That you have to move on to the next chapter in life In the world where change is the only constant thing
We move on... hoping against hope that things will be good ahead And the nostalgia will go back to its corner in your mind and this too shall pass...
And then there are times when the happiness settles in When we hope that none of it goes away When "forever" does not seem absurd.. But as the good times roll, we wonder if they will last.. or like the bad times.. This too shall pass...
i was meaning to do this for a long time now... but somehow never got down to it... but was just inspired by my friend Shaz's post on "the bubble", a post called Chapters... (http://shaazyspeaks.blogspot.com/)
Its been over a year and half i think since i've written anything... let alone update my blog.... i dont' know why really... it just happened that way... :)
so well.... like i was saying... "the bubble" Shaazy was talking about... the bubble that kinda enclosed us when we lived in manipal... it was a world in its own actually... where you can be yourself without thinking too much about the others (that is, if you don't want to think abt them)... the security, the freedom, the ppl, the lessons and ofcourse.. college :D
Manipal... ive spent the best three years of my life here... and there's hardly anything that compares to that... really... and going back this time was in itself a lesson in many ways... the value of people, the value of freedom.... so many other indescribable things...
There are so many things to say.... i don't even know where to start... from the experience.. the people.... the place itself... the first time i saw it...
ok... lets start from the place and the expeience... i've said this many times... when i first arrived in manipal... i had a very rosy picture of life and four "friends" that i thought were my life... Ah my FIRST BIG MISTAKE....
But slowly i've learnt... from many things.. from many people... they shall be mentioned soon... :)
I made friends, i learnt the importance of work... i learnt to enjoy work... and discovered freedom in a sense that hardly anyone outside manipal can ever experience... Here i've learnt soooooooooooo many things... abt life... i'm not saying that i wouldn't have learnt things if i didn't ever come to manipal.... may i would have learnt more... maybe not...
anyways.... now all those ppl who mattered in my manipal life... and have left a mark.. forever
this list isn't in any order of preference or importance it is just a list of ppl i love
Ruchika... my oldest friend in manipal... we've come a long way since the day i tried to chuck her out of her own room (her first day!!!) :P but yaa... its been a roller coaster ride ruchi... and its been a lot of fun... the laughter, the tears, the anger sessions, the long discussions, you inspiring and encouraging me to do things...gymming, FOOD :P, the trips and what not.... love you loads and loads... and i really miss you :)
Nina.... one of the best friends and room mates i could have asked for... all those crazy music sessions, and those jokes and teasing, the trips, the watching movies and soo many more things that can't be said... and i am just sooooo thankful that Nina Chengappa is in Blore... away from too many friends can do harm... thank god for nina :P muahzz nina ;) lowe you loads... :D
Yatharth... i've always called her my support system.... he he... more like my listening box.... those endless walks, those fights, the secrets, the "emotional quotients", the sunsigns... he he... too much fun they were yaa... and i miss them alot... as much as i miss you ofcourse.... :P YATHHHHHUUUUUUUUUUUUU :P i love you yaa... even if i never call you ;)
Ragamalika... raga my love.... what do i say about this woman.... she's the one who comes and gives me a reality check everytime i move away from the the practical path... someone who was my friend when "i thought i had no friends" (that's how she terms it).... She's also one of those ppl who taught me that i can work and that work is fun... this and all those late night conversations, beach trips, endpoint walks, venu walks, star gazing and soo soo much more... i love you loads raga... i don't know if i've said this to you... but i've always looked up to you... muah Anaswara... My beloved Bum.... aahh what do i say abt you my love... the person who talks to me most during the day... Thank god she's here in blore too.... cuz of her i've learnt several lessons.. in manipal... and made lots of new friends in blore.... but more than anything she's the one who listens (or rather reads) all those whiny talks, all those nostalgic statements that i always make... the one i can endlessly have a "Manipal Discussion" with.... love you loads bum... thanks for everything...
now... Akki's boys (shaaz calls them men now... )
Anadi... the first of the boys that i became friends with.... the reason being simply... he used to make me laugh (initially he was nice enough and didn't tease me...) he he... but the thing abt Anadi is... that when he wants to.. he can invariably make me laugh, whatever maybe the situation.... (as he claims, he knows me inside out)... also.. this guy taught me the importance of working and being busy rather than having an empty mind... an inspiration for me to do several things... :) love you loads athaley
Niranjan... The spoilt one... he he... reason being me... the problem with this guy is.. that despite all the teasing and irritating and screaming and fighting... if he just gives me a smile, sings for me, cracks the dumbest jokes or says "please akki, tum to akki ho na".... i'll do anything for him... and worse.. he knows it... but then.. he can do such nice things for me once in awhile... though he kills it by saying "arre tumhe special feel karadiya"... nevertheless an essential part of my manipal life... i love you loads niranjan... FATTY ;P
Shazzy.... One of the happiest ppl i know... the thing i love about shaaz is... whatever maybe inside... he'll always have a smile, a hug, and the AKKKKIIII song... everytime he sees me... i don't know if i've told you shaazy but you have one of the most contagious smiles ever... love you loads shaazy... muah :)
Azmal... intense conversations, gyaan, dieting, exercising, moral support, ghost stories and ofcourse... bike rides... me and azmal have had great times, great coversations and also really weird fights... but he's taught me a lot of things (and he says i've taught him alot of things)... thanks azmal for everything... life in manipal wouldn't have been crazy enough if you weren't a part of it... love ya.. :)
Kiran .... My Big Brother in Manipal.... done a million things for me and i can never do enough for him to return all the favours... thank you so much for everything kiran... for being such an awesome friend.... and for making manipal less scary for me for the first few days... :)
Suraj... My favoritest super junior... he's one of those that i never thought i could be friends with (for some odd reason).... but that was until i got to know him... he has to be one of the sweetest people i know... sometimes too sweet for his own good...but he's been awesome.... Suraj... all those blue shots and DT sessions are missed... and you're awesome.. love you loads :)
Sameera.... The penguin... one of the cutest ppl i know.... this girl has just brought happiness and smiles to my life... several times... all those hyperactive sessions are never gonna be forgotten sammy... and ofcourse.. our love for "Tenu Le," "Khwaabo Main Tu" and ofcourse "Graduation Song" favorites... love you loads sammy.... come soon to see me :)
Kamna Arya... I don't know where to start... Kamna was always there when i wanted to see a familiar face from home... from school... though we wouldn't meet often, a msg every few days, a small conversation everytime we passed each other, the thought of someone from home or from the "old times, " whatever it be.... i'm soooo grateful that you were there in manipal Kamna... like a reminiscence :)... lots of love... Anthony Aubrey Philo.... We became friends cuz of gtalk and then the morning msgs... Aubrey's the one who instilled the whole scenario of Radio and Sound Designing in my Life... our morning conversations, the happiness of TGIF, that one day in City Walk (Delhi) and so many other things... thanks for everything AAP... :)
Nandini and Jacksi.... and ofcourse Sherry.... Mashed Potatoes, the first ever dog i loved, Blue shots, getting high at your place, and parties... thanks for having me at your place whenever i wanted to.... and also for letting me eat all your food... The trips, the sessions, the food and jokes are never gonna be forgotten.... thank you so much for everything.. love you both loads :)
Ashima... My first ever room mate... We've done a lot of fun stuff together... had a few long conversations.. laughed like crazy... shared food... and do you remember that Haunted Mansion I spy game shenoy... he he... they were so much fun... he he.. and ofcourse... the trips and the food sessions will always be rememberd... :D
Ashwini... my room mate.. my conv partner... he he... but its been fun having you as a room mate... someone who cares without expecting too much in return.. that's her... (sometimes that's not so good for her...) the head massages and the conversations and music and ofcourse assignments... thanks for everything ashwini.. love you loads
Prassuna... Prassu... the person who always had time for me when he was in blore... i love you loads prassu... and i miss you alot... those walks in manipal... movies and cauvery meets in blore.. the lunches... i don't even know how to mention in words the craziness abt prassu... i just love you loads prassu.. come soon prassu... muah :D
Bakshi.... another person i never thought i'd be friends with.... until it just happened... all those msg conversations... meets in blore.. the 'date' in Spoons... and business conversations.... would always appreciate all the help, the support and the advice this guy gives me... thank you so much bakshi... smile always.. and when you open your resturant don't forget me... :D
Vinamra .... i wasn't great friends with her when i was in manipal.... Infosys Blore changed that :D... my first job wouldn't have been half as good if it wasn't for you vinnu... cycle boy, grinch, creeps, giggles and ccd... ha ha ha... we became good friends in a short time!!! and hey you're awesome... thanks for everything vinnu... loads of love...
Rahul... For being the sweetest around... and moreover fore being a really really good CR... we owe you an applause atleast Rahul.... thanks for everything... In Manipal and in Blore.... you've been the nicest around...
Himanshu.... The person who's always had good conversations and msgs for me... especially here in blore... Thanks for everything Himanshu.. you're an awesome friend... I could actually keep going... but there are so many people that i have nothing to say for.. but have played a part in my manipal life in some way or the other and am really thankful to them for small/big things that they have done for me... thank you so much. Some of these names are: Rolika Elvin Mansi Bala Nida Karishma Vineeth Naim Ami Roshan Pallabi Dutta Pallavi Arun Joy
I've had a lot of people tell me... "Akki, you're too emotional" or "kyun tum itna senti maarti ho?" there are people who have stopped talking to me only cuz i'm emotional... But ppl, this is the way i am... I am emotional. There's nothing wrong with that... Everyone's like, akki, itna emotional hone se kaam nahin chal ta... i agree.. but its not like i'm always emotional.. its not like i'm always so "Oh My God, this or that person hurt me, or scolded me or bla bla bull shit..."
There are times jab mujhe koi farak nahin padta ki koi kuch bol raha hai.. koi kuch kar raha hai... and to see.. i'm not even remotely emotional about ppl i don't give a damn about.. im only emotional about ppl whom i care about.. people who i call.. Friends... Now i don't see anything wrong in that... and many people among them need to know that i'm not always emotional about them...
And guys.. believe me.. i've been affected enough by all these things to try not to be emotional.. and i have damn well succeeded... but they say na.. a person's fitrat (it's an urdu word which kinda means the 'main characteristics of a person'.. or the 'main idea' behind the person's thinking) doesn't change.... I don't want it to change...
A friend of mine just a while ago asked me... ' why do you care akruti, why do you care if a person is pissed off at you, or is not talking to you...' But its not about caring if the person is pissed off at me.. or whatever bull crap the person is thinking abt me... for me its the alteration in behaviour... i don't know why.. but i get a very queasy feeling if someone's behaviour changes... i, for one, don't like changes...
But then.. its always like that.. everybody changes.. another friend of mine puts it in this way: "Akki... I'm not static.. i can't be the same always... nobody remains the same always.." But its not a change in who you are... it is the change in your behaviour that affects me...
I know for a fact that i won't be able to explain this concept to anyone... so i'll not even try... not that i haven't.. but nobody gets it... but i agree with my friend who says... why do i care.. Exactly... why do i care...
Me being emotional... atleast in front of people has to change...
Just one question though... is it really so bad to be emotional/sentimental?
here are a few questions answered by me and i am going to tag ppl. i have heard its fun...lets see!! What is one weird thing about you that nobody knows till date? When i watch a movie, i sometimes try to imagine myself in place of the charachter i really like in it.. not necessarily the protagonists.. its really fun to think what you would have done or some crap like that!!! he he
Favourite Ice cream flavour? Chocolate... any given day i can have a yummy chocolate sundae!!! The craziest dream you had in the past one week? I dream that some of my classmates have turned against me and are PLOTTING MY MURDER and i was eavesdropping.. then i end up going into the room and beating them up!!! it was scary in the dream but hilarious when i got up...
One embarrassing thing you've done in public, which comes to your mind right now? Too embarrasising to share...
Are you going to be attending MMSC (www.mmsc-manipal.com)? Why or why not? Ofcourse... its a great event to meet new people, learn a lot of things about new media and also discuss and put forth your ideas.. i think everyone who is really interested in anything related to new media should attend it!!!
Tag atleast three other people!!! After you've posted your replies on your blog, you let me know through mine! :) and attend MMSC... its great stuff!!!
People often ask me.. "Akki, were you always this fat???" and my reply is always... "No ya... i started gaining weight only after my 5th grade..." Now don't think that i'm making an excuse or anything...
I've never been a thinny... but i was not this fat either. And the one and only reason... PEPSI... i don't know how many ppl can second me on how pepsi can be excessively addictive... but i was majorly addicted to pepsi to an extent that i had to have at least two bottles every day... every single bloody day and that's about 24 spoons of sugar on an average per day and that doesn't even include all the other things that i used to consume before and after that. I've always had the tendency of gaining weight, but my mum started taking care of my food habits as soon as she saw that i had horrible weight gaining tendencies.. but me like a stubborn idiot, never listened to her and would just fight with her whenever she scolded me for eating something too oily, or having too much pepsi, or having excessive amount of chocolates!!! Was I an idiot... but now its too late to lament..
Anyways, back to Pepsi. I was saying how addicted i was to it and how it stimulated my weight gain even more than i could already manage... I think when you drink a lot of pepsi, its like smoking. A smoker always knows that smoking is harmful to him/her, but he/she still continues. Drinking pepsi is like that... i knew it was harmful for me.. but i still could never resist it.
And even though i don't drink pepsi and all that much anymore, give me a bottle of it and i will still indulge into it.. though i shouldn't and i will prevent addiction to it at all costs.. now when i come to think of it... 12 SPOONS OF SUGAR!!! can't imagine how much i have to run on the treadmill to get rid of all those calories... SIGH!!! why can't yummy things be healthier!?!
These are quotes/messages i really like and want to share them with you:
"I love to walk in the rain, as no one can see me crying..." -Charlie Chaplin Sometimes the smallest of gestures go right to the heart.. A smile from a stranger when you are lost in a crowd, an old friend calling from a distant land, just to say "hi." The touch of your mother's hand on your brow when you are unable to sleep. A message from a friend asking what's wrong when you thought no one noticed, and a hand on your shoulder when it feels like the world's against you, an unexpected hug... Its the tiniest of things that bring happiness in hard times!!!
i love the following quote.. its very catchy: "Everything comes your way, only when you are in the wrong lane on a highway..." -Jim Carey
Problems can make you or break you. The hammer that breaks glass can shape steel. Its up to us to be glass or steel.
No one can go back and make a brand new start. Anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending. God didn't promise days without pain, laughter without sorrow, sunshine without rain... But he did promis strength for the day, comfort for the tears and light for the way.
Happiness is like a radio station, broadcasting all the time. You just have to learn how to tune in and receive it properly.
Another one i simply can't forget What will you do if one day the whole world be on one side and you on the opposite? Simple... just turn back and you'll be the leader of the world... That's attitude!!!
"Bury my body and don't build any monument. Keep my hands projected outside, so that the world knows, I who won the world, had nothing in hand when dying." -Alexander in his death bed
Live with no excuses and love with no regrets. When life gives you a 100 reasons to cry, show life that you have a 1000 reasons to smile.
My most favorite line: In time of difficulties, don't say "God, I have a big problem," but instead say, "Hey problem, I have a big God!"
Whatever happens today, just relax and manage to make a smile. Life is not a problem to be solved, but a gift to be enjoyed. Make everyday your best day.
You live in your dreams, but dreams may die. Don't get shattered, never ever cry. The world is big and has lots to give. Pick a new dream... that's the way to live.
Don't walk as if you rule the world... but walk as if you don't care who the hell rules the world.. that's called Attitude!
No man in this world is rich enough to buy his past. So enjoy each and every moment!!!
Another one that i can't forget ever: Smile- It brings a difference Dance-Who knows when you won't be able to.. Cry- Holding those emotions in is bad for you. Kiss- It's the most wonderful thing in the world. Laugh- What's the point in hiding the happiness? Frown- Why not let them know you're unhappy? Apologize- It doesn't lower you in anyone's eyes... Hug- There's no better feeling being wrapped up close to someone you love Live- Because life is everything you have.
Never take life seriously, 'cause no one comes up alive anyways
The greatest pleasure in life is to do what people say you cannot do.
This is one of my most favorite forward messages... it talks about a way of life, which is difficult to follow; but if one would follow it, he or she would be much happier.
People are often unreasonable and self-centred; forgive them anyway. If you are kind, people may accuse you of ulterior motvies; be kind anyway. If you are honest, people may cheat you; be honest anyways. If you find happiness, people may be jealous; be happy anyway. The good you do today may be forgotten tommorow; do good anyway. Give the world the best you've got and it may never be enough; give your best anyway. For you see, in the end, it's between you and God; It never was between you and them anyways!
First of all, my concept of God.. its not religion.. it's spiritual. Its like my friend Anadi puts it, "You and your relationship with God is a very personal and private thing" I don't believe in religion... so here.. God means something different to me.. something inexplicable, so we may have a God's image in our mind and relate this poem in different ways from each other...
Anyways. Now, the forward.. its a very beautifully put up piece of writing... and according to me very true. Though people say everything you do should have a purpose, and even better, it should be profitable; sometimes you should do things that are selfless... just for doing it, to spread kindness, to be happy. "To do something just because you want to do it, for your own happiness, " according to my friend raga (read her latest blog post; you'll find her blog on the list of blogs at the corner") Not meaning to preach here... But i live my life for the main goal of happiness; directly and indirectly everyone is doing exactly that...
Me... the sentimental sorts... love to collect good quotes, nice phrases, poems,etc.. so you'll find a lot of that on my blog... I'm a complete music lover. Mostly fun loving, but sometimes slightly moody.. That's not all i am.. but maybe you got the basic picture..
P.S. this blog is mostly personal ranting away!!!
